


Gardening Advice

by killerweasel



Series: Friends in Low Places [15]
Category: Good Omens (TV Series)
Genre: Gen, Ineffable Bureaucracy (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-06
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:33:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24047473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killerweasel/pseuds/killerweasel
Summary: Crowley gives Gabriel some advice and not just about gardening.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Beelzebub/Gabriel (Good Omens)
Series: Friends in Low Places [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1654894
Comments: 5
Kudos: 45





	Gardening Advice

Title: Gardening Advice  
Fandom: Good Omens (TV Series)  
Characters: Gabriel, Crowley  
Pairings: Aziraphale/Crowley, Beelzebub/Gabriel  
Word Count: 937  
Rating: G  
A/N: After Episode 6.  
Summary: Crowley gives Gabriel some advice and not just about gardening.

"You're doing it wrong."

Gabriel jumped at the sound of Crowley's voice. He'd been so busy concentrating on the flowers he was planting he hadn't even noticed the demon approach. "I'm doing it exactly like the man at the store said. 'Dig a small hole and put the plant inside'."

Crowley made a rude noise. "First of all, you've got them too close together. Second, you should have some stakes in the ground to give them more support or they're going to fall over once they bloom. And third, these shouldn't even be on this side of your place. They won't get enough sun and then they'll get those horrible spots."

The Archangel wiped the dirt from his hands on the grass before standing up. "I have five flats of flowers and vegetables I need to plant. If you give me a hand, it'll get done twice as fast and I'll know how to do it correctly. After all, you're the expert."

A snap from Crowley's fingers put the plants Gabriel had already finished back into their previous containers. "And maybe I'll teach you how to put the fear of Gabriel into them. It makes them grow better."

"That's why your plants tremble when you wander by!" Gabriel chuckled softly. "I wondered if it was just a demon thing, but they didn't seem to do it when Beelzebub was checking them out." He grabbed a tray of flowers and followed Crowley around the back of the cottage. "She wants to try to start some beehives once we've got everything planted."

"If it works out, Aziraphale would love fresh honey." Something must have shown on his face because Gabriel burst out laughing. "Don't say anything. You will completely ruin what I currently have in my head if you mention Beelzebub and honey."

Giving Crowley a look, Gabriel walked over to the flowerbeds he'd prepared previously. "I'm going to go back to the gardening place at some point to get roses. I've heard they're difficult to grow."

"Depends on the rose and how much effort you want to put into it. I know a little old lady just outside of London who has fantastic roses every year and she doesn't do anything special. Told me something along the lines of 'they'll either grow or they won't, but I'm too old to fight with them'." Crowley frowned at the tools Gabriel had set out. "You don't even have what you need to do this correctly. I'll get mine. If you break anything, you're buying me a new one." He snapped his fingers and a set of matching gardening tools appeared.

"Watch what I do with the first one and then I'll mark on the dirt where you should put the rest. While you're working on those, I'll get the stakes ready for the next batch." Crowley was busy for a few minutes and then he set his tools down. "Have you been back there since what happened?"

"Thought about it." Gabriel's hand tightened on the handle of the spade until he heard the wood start to creak. He let it fall out of his fingers before he broke it. "They would like me to pop up there from time to time. I just don't have any reason to do it. I don't have to be there any longer, maybe I never had to be there in the first place. I like it here. There's just so much... more." He gestured with his hands at everything around them. "Aziraphale said he'd go up with me if I decided to do it. Hell, Beelzebub said it too, but I think she'd just like to see if she can make a few of their heads explode in shock."

"You know it's fine if you never go back, right? But if you do want to be there at some point, we'll help you. I don't even have to go up looking like this. Could be a snake on your neck or a small one in your pocket. Just saying." Crowley cleared his throat and then when back to what he'd been doing before.

"Thank you. I mean that." Gabriel's fingers were shaking a little as he picked up the spade and began to dig another hole. "If I decide to do it, you'll be the first to know, Crowley." He carefully put the first plant into the ground. "You can really make yourself small enough to fit into a pocket?"

"You don't believe me?"

"I didn't say that. I just... I can't picture it." He felt demonic power rise up next to him and then Crowley was gone. In the demon's place was a red-bellied black snake the size of Gabriel's palm. The snake's body language somehow managed to convey a rude gesture in the Archangel's direction. "Hey! No need to be a dick about it."

Another surge of power restored Crowley to his human form again. "I've been smaller than that, but it's a bit more dangerous. Too many things like to eat tiny snakes." He shivered. "On the other hand, the largest I've ever been was back in Eden when I first met Aziraphale."

"Beelzebub turned into a fly the size of a golden retriever once." Gabriel shook his head. "Had nightmares for a week after that."

"Do I want to know why she did that?"

"Nope."

"Right." Crowley ran a hand through his hair. "I know we haven't gotten very far, but I think we could both use a drink or two and some lunch. Aziraphale should be getting back soon if you want to come to mine."

"I'd like that."


End file.
